My Riffs

How much restraint can you show? You can test this by measuring how you can keep your mouth closed. The tongue is the most difficult thing to restrain. If you can master control over your words, you have mastered restraint.

There’s a bad side to everyone. If we don’t keep that side in check, we are capable of being someone we aren’t proud of. There is a war inside everyone and we get to decide which side wins. If you sense the bad side creeping up, don’t give it an inch. Clamp down on it immediately. Stifle it. Extinguish it immediately. 

Many things land outside our control. But the truth is, we can control a lot more than we think. We can't control other people and circumstances, but we can control our response. And that response is ultra important, mores than the event itself. So you're in control, you get to decide the next move.

You have much power. You get to choose every response. Nobody can make you lash out. Nobody can make you  respond angrily. Nobody can make you yell. Nobody can make you lose your temper. Nobody can make you jealous. Nobody can make you say things you shouldn’t. You choose. It’s your choice what you want to say or do. 

Self control is the ultimate mastery. There’s no larger task than controlling ourselves. If we can learn to control ourself we control everything we need. 

I can think of few if any instances where being uncontrolled is good. Self discipline and self control are skills that may be hard to master, but if you don't something else will master you. Often your weakest temptation will master you. Be in control, being uncontrolled leads to bad places.

Sometimes you need to be quick and others slow. Quick to forgive and quick to give. Slow to be angry and slow to judge. We're often hasty for the wrong things. If something comes quickly to you, make sure it's the right thing.

One major sign of gaining more self control is when you don't take your inner turmoil or moods out on other people.

I’ve learned it’s actually super important how you start your day. If your day doesn’t get off to a good start it’s hard to get on course. There are lots of things within our control to start a day right. It just usually requires some self discipline. 

Everyone seems to have "that thing" or "those things" that just really get us. Sometimes we call them pet peeves. We have areas where we just seem vulnerable to allowing something to get under our skin. They may even be very legitimate issues, but they also identify areas of weakness or vulnerability. We can be troubled about a situation, but cannot let it master us. Once it masters us, we lose the ability to overcome it.

What you deeply desire will always happen. Desiring good things will ultimately produce good things. Desiring unhealthy things will ultimately end up getting unhealthy things. Constant checking of our desires is necessary to keep ourselves heading in the right direction. 

We feel many different things in a given day. We experience many different emotions in a given day. We have a lot of different thoughts in a day. You may or may not be able to stop negative emotions, thoughts and feelings, but what you can manage is your reaction to them. When you can control your reactions, you have mastered yourself.

It’s one of the most valuable skills to work on. When we work on self, we make the world a better place. People without self control are dangerous to themselves and people in contact with them.

Are things in your life out of control? Or even are things not what they should be? Maybe your not controlling the things that you have full control over. Because when we reign in and take control of the things within our ability, we suddenly have a lot more control over things than we realized. What's the things we absolutely have control over? Here's a few I can think of: - Our thoughts. We 100% can control our thinking, and more importantly need to learn to do so. - Our diet. For almost everyone we have complete control over what we eat. And what we eat deeply effects us. - Our actions. This one is obvious. - Our consumption. What media, what entertainment are we consuming? - Our physical condition. To a large degree we are in control of our physical condition. How much do we exercise? How good is our hygiene? Take control of these things and you will find you're far down a good path.

If joy is a choice, that means that negative emotions come without us asking them. What if you can get to the point where anger is a choice to? And it's something you choose to never accept. Self control can lead you to that point.

It's a very dangerous thing to gloat. Pride comes before a fall and gloating is pride. When something good happens to you, be humble. When something bad happens to someone else, stay humble. It could be you and very well may be another time.

This is an interesting phrase. In it's purest form, it has nothing to do with status or position. Being a bigger person has to do with what level you are operating on. Being a bigger person means, refusing to operate on a level that includes pettiness. Being a bigger person does not mean, belittling someone because you're bigger. Being a bigger person means, operating in love. Operating in grace. Operating in generosity. Operating in kindness. Operating in deference. Operating in humility.

Deferring to others is a challenge because it means putting our preferences on the back burner. But it's not big things we need to give up in deferring to others. Giving up our favourite seat, moving our schedule to accommodate their timing, eating at their choice spot, speaking about their interests and etc... Really not big stuff, but it's difficult for us to shelf those preferences. The things about it is, the benefits in deferring to others far outweigh defaulting to your own preferences. In deferring to others we learn things we wouldn't have known, we experience things we never would have experienced and we become stronger as we practice putting ourselves second. Deferring also lets the other person know they're important.