My Riffs

Today was the Calgary Tower's 50th birthday. We went and visited the iconic building and viewed the city from the top. Many pictures of Calgary include the tower, it's become an icon of Calgary. Many people see the tower and automatically know it represents Calgary. An icon is something that represents something larger or more complete than itself.  We're all iconic of something.  What are you representative of?

Those bad, unpleasant memories seem to stick moreso than the good ones. Why is that? I'm sure a psychologist would have some good insight into this very thing. Those stinging bad memories are hard to erase. But how soon do we forget that kind work someone had for us? How soon do we forget the outpouring of love we may have received? What if we work to reverse this memory issue. I think it's possible simply by dwelling on the good things that happen rather than stewing on the bad things that have happened.

We're all similar yet still different. We have a whole lot more in common than differences though. We all share so much, and really are so similar, while leaving room for each person to be unique. I think sometimes we celebrate our similarities at the cost of celebrating our differences. Each person wants to be unique, but we often celebrate how we are similar rather than different. While there's much strength in our similarities, there is often untapped strength within our differences. If we choose to celebrate then. It's easy to marginalize someone who is different than us. Somehow it's almost too natural. But many times, if we choose to celebrate the difference, there is much strength to gain. All the same makes for weakness. All different makes for weakness too. Celebrating our similarities and differences in balance can bring strength. Areas to improve in celebrating differences: - Gender differences - Cultural differences - Philoso...

So many petty things we fight for. Some things are 100% worth fighting for. But many of the things we fight for, insist on and are unmovable on aren't worth it. Knowing what's worth fighting for and what isn't should come with age. More often than not, letting go of something is the wiser choice. Don't waste life and energy on the petty fights. The pettier the fight, the small the spoils of winning.

Every coin has two sides. There's two sides to every issue... at least. I'm learning that I can never convey the full story, and the full story is never conveyed to me. Every story can be told from a different view point based on the observer or participant. Every story has a background. Every story has outside influences not even in the story. The point being, things are more complex than we often can even get credence to. Don't get so set in your way of thinking, or your version of the events. There are so many other aspects that you likely haven't even considered. So, to tell a full story is nearly impossible. Take every story with a grain of salt, there is almost infinitely more to it then what is being told.

So often when we're in a particular season, it can feel like we're in it permanently. It really helps to take a deep breath and know it is just a season and it will pass. Getting tunnel visioned about a particular season in our lives can cause much unnecessary frustrations. Zoom out, and try and picture the larger perspective. The larger our perspective, the less the tiny things will bother us.

We need to become somewhat self sufficient. To a point where we aren't a burden on other people, but where we can in fact become a strength to other people. Yet, there is a danger in becoming so self sufficient to the point where we cut ourselves off from other people. Because no matter how strong we become, how wise we think we are, we will always need other people. We need their eyes to see ourselves more completely. We need their voice to speak to us if we're a bit off track. We need their arms to lean into when we have moments of weakness. So become self sufficient yes, but don't become an island.

This is a similar post to yesterday’s... But everything I can think of that carries value, has weight. That weight can be physical, mental, emotional or spiritual. If something is easy, chances are it isn’t valuable. Yes, there are many unnecessary things we can carry. And there is a huge difference in unnecessary weights and valuable weights. And it takes wisdom to discern the difference between the two.

You cannot get stronger without feeling weak. Anything of value takes work. Success never comes easy. A stormy sea makes for an experienced sailor. Responsibilities don't come without prior experience. Building something takes time and much work. We're not defined by our failure but rather how we react to our failures. ... all this to say, getting stronger often looks a lot like work, failure and maybe even misery. Good things may come to those who wait, but more likely they come to those who go through difficult things and work hard.

Fear cannot be boiled down to two things, but for today, let's look at two major sides of fear. 1. Fear as the result of believing a lie. 2. Fear as the opportunity to gain something. Many, many fears are the result of buying into a lie. The lies vary quite drastically from "I'm not good enough" to "that's not possible" and even to "people will think bad things about you if...". These types of fears should just be discarded. It's often hard to filter out what's truth and isn't when it comes to the lies we have often told ourselves though. It takes usually a trusted outside source to help filter those out. The second side of fear is in the potential. The potential in fear is quite surprising. When we fear something, we are faced with an opportunity. Usually an opportunity to gain something of value. The value could again range from "victory over something that has held us back" or to "accomplish something ...

In general, there are three ways we can lead: 1. Speak 2. Listen 3. Do They are all crucial and important. As a parent I would rank them in the following order of importance though: 1. Do 2. Listen 3. Speak My kids will remember less of what I have said to them and more of what I have done. What I do will be much more profound than what I say. I can say stuff all day about what's right and wrong, but really they will take their queues from what I do, not say. And more often than not, listening to them will be more profound than speaking to them. I'm not minimizing the need and important of words here. Words are of utmost important once value. You can create and destroy someone simply by using words. The point here is that while your words are of utmost value, your actions carry even more impact. And often times your ears can be more effective than your words. But it all matters. If you prioritize them in the order of Do, Listen and then Speak, you will be much...

Social media has some great real life applications we can extract from the platforms and technology and put to use in the real world. Keeping scrolling! Scroll past the pettiness. Scroll past the unimportant. Scroll past the negative. Unfollow! Unfollow the drama. Unfollow the politics. Unfollow things that bring you down. You don't need to follow everyone on social media, and you don't have to pay attention to every single thing you see online and on social media. The same thing can applied to the real world. Don't pay attention to every single insignificant thing. Don't pay attention to every thing you hear. Don't pay attention to negativity. Stop following the dramas, the politics, the unimportant things that clamour for your attention. We only have so much time and energy, don't waste it on the advertisers (loudest people) and the propagandists and the politicians. Listen to those closest to you. Listen to your heart. Listen and pay attention...

Our strengths are generally quire greatest assists. For sure when it comes to business and interactions. That's not to say though that there isn't utility in our weaknesses. For our weaknesses can often be used for growth and learning. But the thing with strengths is, then can become weaknesses when managed incorrectly. Be careful to not rely too heavily on your strengths. Be careful to not overextend and overuse your strengths. Be careful not to use your strengths to take advantage of people and situations. Every strength can become a weakness if we let it.

We all have seen when narrative's get hijacked by a certain point of view or sometimes by one particular person. Then the whole conversation changes into something it shouldn't be. We start asking the wrong questions and end up getting the wrong answers. The wrong answers inform our actions and wrong actions may be taken. It's important the narrative is clear and honest. That is doesn't take on too much bias. I have seen master's of controlling the narrative. And the thing about the masters of steering narratives is, almost nobody every even realized the narrative has been steered and controlled by the master. I'm not speaking about manipulative actions whatsoever here either. I am talking about truth seekers and wise people who see an off course narrative and steer it back to the centre, usually without the people in the conversation even knowing. That's when you know someone wise has controlled the narrative, when they aren't even noticed.

One of the things I regret most about my younger years is wasted time. If I had realized the value of time then like I do now, I would have lived quite a bit differently. But as adults we can still waste so much time and yet convince ourselves we're doing something important. Essentially, if you're not using your time to invest in either yourself or someone else, you may be wasting it. Investing in yourself can have many different looks, from schooling to rest. Investing in others also can have very many different looks to it as well. Don't waste time, because it's truly the only non-renewable resource we have.

I've heard this said, and I think there's a lot of truth to it. But you can't always trust the heart alone, you have to trust the head too. The heart can be deceitful and want things it shouldn't have. So don't automatically just accept that whatever the heart wants it okay. In terms of being kind, loving people and dealing with other people, let your heart be your guide though. But don't trust it unquestionably.

Our worldview is our lens which we view everything through. It's important to know what your worldview/lens is. I've come across those whose worldview seems quite skewed, and probably alters their reality to the point where they are almost dysfunctional. If only they realized their worldview was so skewed, they could have had a much more balanced worldview and likely would have positioned themselves to meet their challenges better. Is the world a cold, cruel place?  Is everyone out to get you? Is everything meaningless? Is there true love? These types of things are what shape your worldview. Today I feel like we are seeing increasingly negative and pessimistic world views.

Not financial investments either. I'm talking about time and talent investments. I've seen so many people invest in things that don't last long. I've seen people focus on such shallow and temporary things to the detriment of building something better for themselves. Oftentimes the brightest most alluring investments are the shallowest. Working hard is rarely attractive. But trying to look smart, rich, funny, successful, important so often occupies our resources and we are the real losers at the end.

Try changing your perspective. This can be very very difficult, but it's entirely possible. Try looking at it possibly broader. Zoom out and think about a wider perspective of the issues. Try looking at it from the other side. Change places with someone on the other side of the issue. Try taking a break. Stop thinking about it for a bit and maybe a fresh perspective will emerge. Try looking at if from down the road. Imagine the issue in a month, year, or 5 years, see if a different perspective emerges.

Here's a video I put together from our recent trip to Montreal.

“A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor.” ―  Franklin D. Roosevelt. It's a challenging world. Making a living, cultivating relationships, developing oneself, venturing out into the unknown and discovering, getting rest, growing, strengthening ones self... all part of a complex life that we find ourselves in. We often need a safe place to go to in order to rest. This hopefully is what your home is, a place of peace and rest. To recover from whatever your facing outside. If the battle is within the home, it's hard to be a success outside the home. Make your home a place of peace and respite. But we have to equally venture out into the chaos of life. Staying safe doesn't help us stretch and grow. We need that balance of safety and challenge. We cannot do both at the same time. So venture out into the unknown. Push yourself from your comfort and stretch yourself. You will always have your home to return to a rest in. Going to work everyday can do this....

If you aren't content with what you have today, you won't be content with what you have tomorrow. Take inventory of what you have today. It's likely enough to be content with.

Most of what we hear has some form of spin attached to it. Most of what we see has some underlying agenda. I don’t mean this in a cynical way where everything is undermining and not trustworthy. I mean this as is with any information (audio or visual, book or video) there is a reason it’s being said and it’s context is being shapen by the creator of the information. The creators background and worldview is effecting what and how they are saying things. So develop your filter. Be able to decipher what’s spin, what’s bias and what’s accurate. Listen to others and develop your filter. Don’t be negative and assume the worst, but learn to filter. Not everything you hear and see is true and accurate.

Labels are good and they're bad. In some situations you need to label something in order to fix it or identify it. But on the other hand, when we label someone, we limit them. And that's definitely not a good thing. But... it seems we all end up with some form of a label. She's a sweetheart. He's a thoughtful person. or She's cold. He's self centred. If I could choose my label, I think I would choose "He's kind". I would rather that label that than: he's funny, smart, rich, popular...

The first step is often the most difficult. Business venture, new product, difficult conversation, starting a dreaded task... Once we get past the first step we often get the sense “we can do this”. But it’s stepping out into the unknown that is so extraordinarily challenging.

A very emotional and moving call to personal ownership from a former Navy Seal.

You can collect things if you want. You can spend a ton of resources and effort in getting more of whatever "things" you wish. These "things" can get lost, broken, taken away or stolen. If you collect memories though, these can never get taken away. Memories will outlast things.

The more you read the better. Read books, read people, read situations, read the tea leaves (future). The better you become at reading, the better you will succeed at living.

As long as enough isn’t enough, you will never get ahead.  The key to getting ahead is knowing when enough is enough. 

History is written by the victor. That's what the saying is anyway... and it's probably quite true. History may often then be written incorrectly or unfairly. The other thing about history is, it's very hard to change. Wrong doings are hard to overturn. Mistakes are hard to make amends for. Lost trust takes a long time to rebuild. Incorrect facts may never get corrected. How much effort is worth pouring into the past? Whether history was written unfactually, incorrectly or unfairly and we want to correct it, it is a momentous task to change it. Here's the thing about history: It's not usually worth trying to change. The same effort can be put into the future, and that we can shape and change. Sure, history informs and sets the path for the future. But the future is much more malleable and within our control. Letting go of the past is one of the most empowering things we can do.

We have an innate instinct to put more weight into the first source we encounter on something. I think it’s the way our brains work relying on previous information to inform current and future information. So it may be instinct, but it can get us into trouble. Weigh and measure the first source you encounter on something. It may not be as valuable as other sources and we may get tricked into relying too heavily on a misinformed or weak source.