My Riffs

If you're not intentionally looking for the good, the bad will overtake you. The default seems to be to pick out what's wrong or what's bad first. And then often get sidetracked by the bad or wrong. Then we forget the good. It takes some habit forming to be a person to always look for the good first.

Another way of saying my point from yesterdays post is this: everything will have something you don't like. So inevitably there will be letdowns if you place too much expectation.

You may get what you want but guaranteed it won't be everything you thought it would be. Sometimes we want something so so badly. It may totally consume us. Sometimes it's not every something particularly wrong or bad. It may even be a good thing. But inevitably it won't be everything you thought it would. As you get older you learn to temper your expectations and that helps.

Yes, knowledge is power. If you're looking to hire someone, you want someone who has the knowledge. But a skill even more valuable is someone who can figure things out on their own. Ones who can self teach and problem solve. You learn how to problem solve and you will have a skill that many don't.

A good test of ones character is in how they treat someone who can’t help them. Or how they treat someone who needs help.

Leaders are stewards of resources. You only have a finite supply of resources. Whether that’s financial, material or people resources. You want to maximize the impact of using your resources. They can be floundered away. A good question to ask is, will the potential outcome be worth the investment? You want that answer to always be yes.

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr summed this up so perfectly. "Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive our darkness; only light can do that". Someone is being unfair, mean or ugly? Don't multiply it. Don't fight anger with anger. Don't fight lies with lies. Don't fight unfairness with partiality. Counter these things with the opposite. Love, patience, truth, fairness, etc.

Don't become callous. Guard your heart from callous. Guard your sympathy and empathy from callous. Guard your generosity from callous. Guard your love and trust from callous. Becoming callous is self destructive.

When you read a book, either fiction or non-fiction, there's a bias to it. When you listen or read something, there's a bias to it. That doesn't mean the bias is wrong or bad, but there is a bias. It's totally okay, but it's wise to understand the bias in what you're learning, listening, watching or reading. Because sometimes the authors have very bad bias and if we're not careful they can slip those things into what we're consuming without us hardly even knowing.

People really believe what you do, not what you say. When the two don’t match up, people believe what you do. When the two do match up what you say packs extra punch.

We can start to make our identity the things that are our problems or weaknesses. Yes, we may only be as strong as our weakest link, but we don't have to identify or become our problem. "I'm weak" "I'm poor" "I'm slow" "I'm not good at___" These are all things we say that identify us as our weaknesses. How much stronger to base our identity around our strength and what we're good at. Maybe by doing so, those weaknesses will be overcome or minimized.

One of the best and most rewarding things you can do if you want your life to get better is simply to get grateful. Gratefulness can improve our health both mentally and physically. And we all have something to be grateful for. Yes, some people have been dealt a very tough hand. But I believe everyone can find some thing(s) to be grateful for. And that’s a great starting point for your life to get better.

Men do not stumble over mountains, but molehills. Confucius

What we accept as facts can’t easily be changed in our minds. Even though facts aren’t as sure as we think they are. Facts are often overturned when a better version of truth comes out. We have to be careful what accept as a fact. Because what we’ve accepted as facts guides our judgement.

Sometimes we're a lot closer than we think. And sometimes it's something actually really small holding us back. My mom was trying to sew some clothes this weekend, but the sewing machine wasn't cooperating. After some investigation, it was the tiniest screw and tiniest little piece of metal that was making it unusable. 99.9% of the machine is working just fine but that .01 percent was enough to stop the whole thing from operating as it should. We ordered a replacement part and it will be in good working order in no time. But it got me thinking what small thing or things could I possibly change that could have big impacts in my life? Are there some habits or some lack or habits that we could adjust to make some big gains?

I get so focused on the destination that I forget to enjoy the journey. The joy of reaching the destination is so short lived. The more joy to be gleaned from enjoying the entire journey. Enjoy the learning to arrive at your destination. Enjoy the work while you push for your destination. Enjoy the resistance as you gain strength fighting through the resistance of getting to your destination. The journey is truly where it’s at!

If you never re-evaluate, you can get off course. You can start on in the right direction, but slowly go off course. Re-evaluating help keep you on course. You can re-evaluate by checking in with a boss or mentor. You can re-evaluate by checking in with the goals you set. You can re-evaluate by listening to those who care about you. You can re-evaluate by listening to your heart. It's important to do so in life and in your career. If you don't you will most likely end up in a place you never intended on going.

One of the greatest virtues is humility. You can become humble simply by being honest with yourself. When we're honest with ourselves we end up being humble.

People can become desensitized to the point where they do unimaginable things. You don't get there overnight, but you get there bit by bit. You take in something that you know isn't right and if you take it in again, it will be a bit easier. You can keep taking it in until it becomes easy and a part of you. It will sear you conscience. And once it's seared it's very difficult to go back. So when your conscience nudges you, take that as a HUGE warning. Becoming desensitized is not a good thing. It's a slippery slope with a tragic ending.

From the best of my understanding, knowledge and judgement, traditional education is gone. It's been replaced by indoctrination. Children as young as 5 are being indoctrinated by agendas from political and influential spheres. While some formal education is still necessary, it's equally necessary to go into the "education" knowing it's more indoctrination than "education". More and more I believe formal education (especially post-secondary) can be skipped. But the bad thing is, the indoctrination starts very young. Parents cannot be too careful. Don't leave education to "educators", you do the education. Educate to insulate against the inevitable indoctrination. And keep them away from the system as long as possible. (yes, this is an opinion piece :)

Today I posted on my IG a quote that said in short, you don’t have to have an opinion on everything. It’s good practice to not have an opinion on some things. The point is, don’t get sucked into every drama around you. In our world today, everything is polarizing. But we should practice not letting every single thing polarize us. My opinion needs to learn self control :)

Your strength is only equal to what you've been through. You can't gain strength from any other method other than going through something tough. If you see somebody strong, they weren't necessarily born with that strength. You can know for sure they have been through some tough stuff.

Starfish Story One day, an old man was walking along a beach that was littered with thousands of starfish that had been washed ashore by the high tide. As he walked he came upon a young girl who was eagerly throwing the starfish back into the ocean, one by one. Puzzled, the man looked at the girl and asked what she was doing. Without looking up from her task, the girl simply replied, “I’m saving these starfish, Sir”. The old man chuckled aloud, “Little girl, there are thousands of starfish and only one of you. What difference can you make?” The girl picked up a starfish, gently tossed it into the water and turning to the man, said, “I made a difference to that one!”

If you’re not improving, you’re getting worse. There really isn’t such thing as staying the same. If you stay the same you get worse. Continuous improvement is the only way to stay on the growth path.

Don’t wish to be given something. Wish to earn it. Earning is much better than being given. People that have been “given” big lottery wins have time and time again threw it all away. Had they earned that money, they likely wouldn’t have thrown it away. I’m also thinking about respect. Earn it, don’t wish to just be given it. There’s many other things to earn too, trust would be another good one though.

When you love what you do it makes it a whole lot easier. But even at that the love may grow thin. You may love your job but eventually that will wear thin. That’s where commitment kicks in. You have to love something and be committed to it for it to last. This of course goes for relationships but it also goes for anything we take on.

This is a both exciting and scary formula. That is, the mercy you give others will be the mercy you receive from others. I for sure want to be on the receiving end of lots of mercy. Which means I need to be on the giving end of lots of mercy.

I like new. There's something about when you get something new that I enjoy. It's usually in a near perfect state and maybe it's something to enjoy from a design perspective. The problem with liking new so much is, it sure doesn't last long. That newness of a new car lasts a very very very short while. Till the kids get it messy or until a few payments in. The newness of a material object never lasts long. The newness in a relationship eventually wears off and your left with who that person really is. What's the point? Maybe I should be more obsessed with what I already have since anything new is fleeting (from a satisfaction perspective). I'm sure what we already have (relationships, material possessions) is enough to be content and even happy. New is an expensive and unwise habit. (I do however have a new child and that is one new thing that is deeply fulfilling)

Freedom is impossible without truth. Truth always precedes freedom. If you're bound by or to something, there's a truth missing in your life.