My Riffs

Being yourself is important. Because you bring things into the world that only you uniquely can. The less you are being yourself, the less you will make the impact you can make. 

As a parent sometimes you have to let your kids make a mistake. Because we all make them, but the key is to be able to learn from mistakes. If all mistakes are teachable opportunities eventually there will be fewer mistakes.  But we will always make mistakes :) But they’re not as bad when we learn how to respond to them. 

One of the best leadership principals I've heard is this:  People don't respond to how you treat them, they respond to what you think about them. Humans are wired for intuition. What you think inside will eventually come out. If you want to treat people right and as an equal than you have to think that first. Or else, it won't be received. Get your thinking right and your actions will follow and furthermore your actions will be believable because they're genuine.

On one hand we're taught to reject labels. People will try and label you but you don't need to accept those labels. Their vision of you is usually uninformed and single dimensional. But the problem is we need to name something in order to do something with it. Both good things and bad things. They have to have a handle that we hold it by and that handle is the name. Maybe one lesson here is in using labels, leave lots of room for a new label as you learn more.

Some of the biggest wastes of time are things we unnecessarily hold onto. Grudges, past wrongs, things that we think should have happened, talking about people, being angry, etc. Why waste another second on things that aren’t even worth it. 

We often get distracted and even consumed by the secondary. Work is secondary. News is secondary. Certain relationships are secondary. The primary often seems easier to put off, but the more we put it off the more we miss the mark.

The saying goes something like "those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it". The most important history to learn from is our own. It's a horrible thing to repeat our own bad history and not learn from it. If we're not learning from our own history, we aren't paying attention.

Connecting based on the lowest common denominator doesn't bear the best results. Connect based on the highest common denominator. Or at least elevate to a higher level than the lowest. Aiming for the lowest point is never a place to expect good productive things.

Laughter is said to be the best medicine. What’s some other medicines then? Kindness Gratefulness Contentment Love Love is probably the truest and best medicine. 

Every investment or output reaches a point where you start seeing diminishing returns.  Exercise is a great example. It's good and makes perfect sense to stay in shape. But at some point if you start exercising a great deal, you start seeing diminishing returns.  Sometimes it's okay to see diminishing returns, but not always. Sometimes it's smart to pull back when you reach that point.

What happened matters less than your response to it.  Focus on your response rather than dwelling on the unchangeable past. 

In today's polarized world, we see so many defined by what they're against rather than what they're for. What you're against is a weaker position than what you're for.  Don't be defined by what you're against, be defined by what you're for.

Listen to learn, write to clarify your thoughts and speak to get feedback on what you’ve learned and clarified.

The weird thing about control is, the more you try and control something the higher the chance you will lose it. By letting something go you more often retain it. You may not immediately lose it, but eventually almost assuredly you will. Letting go doesn't mean not caring either, letting go means not forcing and not trying to control.

A very wise lesson to learn is to have mercy on people. We judge far too quickly and far too harshly. We can never know all that’s going on in a given situation. Every situation has complexities that are difficult to fully ascertain. It’s wise to learn to be slow to judge people. It’s wise to learn how to extend mercy to those we don’t understand. And furthermore it’s wise to learn how to extend mercy to those we don’t agree with. 

 Here are a few things that show your maturity level: - how you celebrate others successes - how you talk about other people - how you handle adversity - how you handle things when life gets real

You don’t fight fire with fire. You don’t fight hate with hate.  When fighting becomes escalating measures nobody wins. When fighting is handled by deescalating with countermeasures that dissipate then both sides can win. 

Having a selective memory is a good thing. There's no benefit in trying to track and record every wrongdoing done. There's no benefit in pointing out every mistake done. Where there is value is in remembering the good. In pointing out the good. Having a selective memory may be a sign of maturity. If our story is just one of bad thing after bad thing, we likely are overlooking a whole lot of potential positives.

Today is a polarized day. There’s no middle ground is seems. If you’re not for one thing than you’re against it. And if you don’t speak in favour of one thing than you’re full of hate. It’s a complicated world we’ve found ourselves in.  There is always a good way out though. Take the high ground. Aim for peace. Blessed are the peacemakers. 

There’s nothing that makes us feel more alive than doing something we’re passionate about. Doing something we dislike puts us in a state where we aren’t truly alive.  When we can spend good portions of our time doing things we enjoy and are passionate about and that are meaningful, that is success. 

I think two of the most powerful phrases there are in human speech are: "I love you" and "I'm sorry". One is a declaration saying that someone is important to you and you care for their well being. The second is a phrase of honesty, saying we were wrong and we want to make amends. Two of the most powerful phrases we can speak and they are both about deferring to others. This is why being selfish is one of the most power zapping things we could do to ourselves.

Time being our most precious resource, the less we have left the more we need to glean everything we can from every single day.

As a kid you’re told to MYOB (mind your own business). And that’s a pretty solid pierce of advice in regards to things you can’t change.

Censorship was a big word today in the news. Venom so ship is a double edged sword because you can censor what people are saying but that won’t stop them from thinking it. It may slow down movements but it won’t stop. It’s better to face bad ideas down in the town square than push the bad ideas to the fringes. Because they won’t die on the fringes. But a better idea can replace a bad idea and that’s the best way to overcome a bad idea. 

Sometimes good enough is enough and sometimes good enough isn’t enough. Knowing when it is and isn’t is the hard part. 

My life and your life is just a vapor. And if what you see is all you see then you do not see all there is to see. - Kirk Franklin

Some days you own and some days own you. That's the nature of things, you have to feel sadness in order to fully experience joy. You have to have some down days to appreciate the better days. But everyday is a gift and something to be thankful for.

The world has been on a trend for quite some time now of blurring things. When everything becomes blurred and loses its distinctiveness it also loses its value. We’ve devaluing ourselves and our institutions in the name of progressivism. Don’t be afraid to be distinctive. 

We’re 10 months or so into the most disruptive event in my lifetime. This pandemic has brought about more change and disruption than any other event in my experience.  Has this made us better or bitter? It’s been a struggle to get better, but there’s been plenty of opportunity to get better.

The goals we've set for 2021, are they goals that make people around us better? Are they goals that make the long term better? Are they goals based on love?

You need to have a plan. Goals are good. We need to aim at something. However, it's easy to get focused on what's next and miss out on what's happening now. The here and now is where we glean from. We don't gain anything from the future, until the future happens. So if we neglect to take what we can from the here and now, we neglect to gain what the present has to offer.