My Riffs

Allowing others a do over is something we should always allow. If we don’t allow it for others we won’t be allowed one ourselves. 

It's obviously love. But a very second close one is patience.

Snow is a beautiful symbol of hope. A fresh start and beautiful refresh to the brownness and ugliness of the ground fall has taken the greeness from. 

You hear two extremes about taking care of yourself. On one hand we’re told we should put our needs second to their. On the other hand we’re told self care is a must in order to be healthy.  I would say it’s a case of “and” not “or”. We need to self care and make it a priority and we need to prioritize the needs of others. That sounds like a complete contraction but I think it should be looked at as a balance not a contradiction. It takes both to be a healthy person. No outflow makes one toxic. All outflow and it leaves one empty. It’s ourselves and others.

Joy doesn’t have to be elusive. Joy comes from contentment and maturity. It doesn’t come from superficial material things. It comes from meaningful things like healthy relationships. Don’t attempt to derive joy from superficial things like status and possessions. 

I read a quote from Epictetus that said "wealth consists not in having great possessions, but in having few wants".  People with great financial wealth may not have fewer wants than someone with much less financial wealth. So what good does the finances do other than give the wealthier individual more "stuff".  True wealth comes when you have few wants. That means your basic needs are taken care of and you're content. That's when you accumulate true wealth.

The most common form of deception is self-deception. The lies we tell ourselves are far more believable than the lies that come from the outside. The more we audit our thoughts the more we can protect against self-deception. We get into trouble not challenging our assumptions and thoughts. We get into trouble when we don't audit our behaviour. We get into trouble when we don't audit our resources and where we spend them. Keeping a reign on these things will help prevent self-deception. Also an honest sounding board will help prevent self-deception. People who can speak to you honestly yet kindly. Who can be a mirror into areas of yourself that you can't see. Not echo chambers, but true sounding boards.

There’s a very good reason when learning something, we’re first taught the basics.  Sometimes when things don’t go well or things go off the rails, getting back to the basics is very useful. Getting back to what set you up for success is what’s needed. Simplifying and getting to the basics can be a reset and accelerator.  Companies will go through periods of internal reviews to ensure they haven’t strayed from their mission. And if they have smart companies adjust.  Same with our personal life. This should be a frequent activity. 

As you get older (and hopefully wiser) your fears change. You fear different things. It doesn't mean you live in fear but the things you do fear change. And you still have to manage your fears as you get older. You fear chasing the wrong things. You fear losing your health. You fear losing your means to provide. A lot of the things we fear we cannot control, and it's wise to do our best to alleviate those fears. But a healthy fear of wasting time or chasing the wrong things is a good thing. We can't control certain things about our health, but we can control where we put our time and energy. It's okay to be afraid of wasting time and finite resources. But we should be fearful to the point of being paralyzed. 

No matter the situation you can always be kind. Dealing with difficult situations, you can be kind. Dealing with rude people, you can still be kind. There are very few situations where we are excused from kindness. Very few. It's safe to say, always be kind. Every text message, every social media post, every traffic incident, every social interaction, it's always best to be kind.

In today's cancel culture it seems we've lost the ability to give people a redo. It's one and done. One mistake and you're cancelled and done. That's not how we learn and grow from mistakes though is it? What if we treated a child this way, it would have horrendous results. We let them make mistakes and teach through them and give them a chance to go again. We don't have to participate in this new cultural norm. Let's be liberal in love and mercy, let's be conservative in judgement and cancellation.

One of the more humbling places you can visit in first world countries is a hospital. It’s worth the trip once in a while to remind ourselves of some important things.  - we’re not immune from “life” - life is a gift and every day is a gift - gratefulness because someone has it worse than you  

Good always has and always will overcome evil. But there is always a time before where it seems evil is running unchecked before good overcomes it.  Always hold to hope of good, because it’s a winning bet. 

The best way to love people is not merit based. But to love wholly.

We’re all guilty of this. We project our preconceived ideas on situations. This is why there are optimists and pessimists. Becoming better at letting the facts dictate what you think is a worthwhile task. 

Quiet is necessary for proper balance. Without quiet we can’t think clear. 

 That we can't see our own shortcomings.

It's amazing how often the answer to a problem is love.

One of the worst conditions a human can come upon is a hard heart. Occasionally you meet someone with a hard heart and it’s a tragic thing to see. They rob themselves of so much. It’s worth having a tender heart. It’s worth enduring some of the hurts you will have having a tender heart. 

A bible scripture says to count it joy when you go through tests and trials. Why? It says it produces patience. That's a challenging truth to understand. The implication is that patience is a huge key to getting through life and future challenges. We should pay attention to our levels of patience if this is the case. Our patience is clearly something to work on and work to grow.

It’s all trades. Time for money. Money for goods.  The best transactions are the ones where we do good for others though. Maybe without them even knowing. Random acts of kindness. Be doing good we will get rewarded because it’s the law of the harvest. But the best transactions are still the ones where we’re not looking for a 1 to 1 transaction. Where we’re trying to help someone else. 

 Without truth what is life except a wandering? - Augustine

If I didn't stop and find something to be grateful today, I may have missed a lot of good. It's easy to look for the big things to be grateful for but miss all the small important things.

Culture is much like a river. The a current and it flows in a certain direction, that's culture. When you try to paddle or swim against the current it's extremely difficult. You can do it for a time but eventually you will run out of energy. It's a losing battle. If you don't like the culture you may have to get out of the river. Swimming against the current is sure to lead to frustration. If you can't get out of the river, you will have to find out how to flow with the culture without joining it. That's a tough spot to be in. Culture trumps vision. Culture trumps good ideas. Culture trumps effort.

 I heard to someone say that life begins at the end of your comfort zone. And I think in a large way that’s true. Once we get comfortable we stagnate. Life declines when we stagnate. Life begins when we grow and we can’t grow from a place of comfort. 

We don't control the seasons. They come to us and we utilize each season for its purpose. It's not worthwhile to fight the seasons. It's worthwhile to learn what they offer and make the best of each season.

If we’re not overall enjoying life, we’re doing it wrong. Life has its ups and downs, but the trajectory should be upwards. Keeping our aim up will help us enjoy life. Looking up and not down will help.