My Riffs

Looking at external things for your joy is a sure way to rarely have joy. Or to often lose it. The best way to find sustainable joy is to find places inside yourself to find joy. A great way to do this is to practice gratefulness and become a grateful person. Gratitude always precedes happiness and joy. Be a person of great gratitude and you will have deep reserves of internal joy. 

You know those people who you really enjoy being around? It’s safe to say those people are optimistic people. They’re people who make you feel safe to share your thoughts and feelings. They’re people who listen. They lift you up and speak words that build and encourage. We need those people and we each can be one of those people. 

If it’s not kind, loving or uplifting, why say it at all?

We focus so much on what could and will go wrong. But we rarely dare to dream of what can go right. We rarely dare to dream what could be. But somebody has to dream, why not be you?

There are toxic people in the world. You want to make sure you aren't one of them. One of the first clues that will give away a toxic person is they are always talking bad about other people. So watch your language, are you talking bad about people or building them up? That's your first clue if you're toxic or not.

We make thousands of decisions everyday. And these decisions are like a steering wheel that directs us certain ways. So every decision, big or small, has some bearing. The more wise decisions we make, the better our direction.   

Every word we utter can fall into three categories I think. 1. Constructive 2. Idle 3. Destructive The more we speak from the first category, the better we become and the better those around us become. Idle words are rarely benign, they tend to turn destructive quickly. Best to avoid this category altogether. Destructive words make us weaker and harm us and those who we speak of and to.  Speak words that build, they make you stronger. Words that are destructive make you weaker.

If there's one thing to develop it's character. Character is the foundation and frame of everything we build. Weak and little character will result in a small and weak product. Strong and built character will result in a strong product. Skill can be developed, but skills won't take you nearly as far as they will with good character. So prioritize good character. And it's a daily task to improve on character. We get there little by little, day by day. Each little decision can build or harm our character. We get to decide what our character is. Many thing happen to us that we don't decide upon. But character is the one thing we can always decide upon.

We’re told (and rightly so) that suffering is part of life. The best option then is to bear these things with as much optimism and dignity as possible. To face them head on and not run from what we’ve been given to bear. Only then will the suffering become something that can help us to grow. 

I think everyone has areas where they’re kinda broken. We often look at others and judge the areas we see then as broken in. But we rarely look at ourselves and the areas were broken in. If we realize we’re broken too, we would be much more merciful on others.

What you sow will eventually grow. You will reap what you’ve sowed. What you’ve sowed will come back to you. Good seed returns good. 

The years 2020 and 2021 have been full of life lessons. It’s been a great growth and learning potential for those who have chosen to be wise with the circumstances.  One great lesson to be learned was the importance of a healthy home. The home hasn’t been this important in a long, long time. If you have a healthy home you can endure a sick world. If you have an unhealthy home in a sick world is makes the world all the less bearable. The need for a healthy has never been greater and the reward of a healthy home hasn’t been greater in this generation. 

Love very often looks closely like giving. Love can look like a lot of different things because love takes on different forms for different situations. But it almost always looks like giving. Giving our time, giving our ear, giving our talent or skill. Love isn’t passive, it requires action. And the action is almost always a form of giving. 

Bitterness grows quite easily, with very little time and attention. With lots of time and attention it grows fast. Bitterness is the thing that grows and chokes the life out of the individual who harbours it. Bitterness can only be dealt with one way, that is, to completely starve it. Uproot it if possible. If not, starve it. Don’t give it an ounce of time and energy. It doesn’t take much for it to grow, so don’t give it anything. 

How do you get better? Not generally by giant leaps. It’s generally in increments, bite sized increments. Don’t look at your most recent set back or mistake, check your trend. Are you trending in the right direction? That’s the most important thing. What are you walking toward, what’s your orientation? If you’re heading towards what’s right, trending in that direction and making incremental steps that way, you’ll end up there. 

Everything can be turned into a victory. Maybe not a pretty one, maybe not a desirable one. But every bad thing can carry a lesson and a victory. Were only defeated when we give up and refuse to change or learn. A bad thing can give birth to a good thing.

I think the best advice there is about critics is to ignore them. It's usually those on the sidelines who criticize. If it's not those on the sidelines, it's those who misunderstand. The best thing you can do to a critic is be kind and love them :) 

The more afraid we get the poorer we think. Fear is more often than not a lie. When we entertain it we start a self propelled downward spiral of cognitive decline. It’s best to cut off fear at the pass. If it’s always proved to be a lie, it will always continue to be a lie.

What I need is much different from what advertisers tell me I need. The message of advertisers is that I'm missing out and need more. The reality is, my needs are much more simple. It's easy to get confused between what I want and what I need.

Words build and destroy. And the things we say negative or positive have a dramatic effect on us. Our thought life is of utmost importance. And the way our thoughts start to have real world implications is when we speak. So our words can build if we use the right ones. Our words can point out the positive and make people and the world a better place. It takes nothing to point out flaws and weaknesses. It takes a good person to point out the good and how to make things even better.

How much you care will show on how much you give. That is, give of your heart, time, talents and resources. 

Some of the greatest learning comes with exploration. There’s not as much to learn in the known. But jump into the unknown to explore and learn.

Sometimes we reach difficulties cause we’ve done the wrong thing. Sometime we reach difficulties cause we’ve done the right thing. Reaching a difficulty on its own doesn’t prove you right or wrong. What you do what that difficulty will though. Difficulties will force us to get better or to quit. To mature or to lose maturity. To forge ahead or to quit. Face the difficulties you reach and grapple with it in the best way you can. The outcome will depend on how you grapple with it. 

Many things online you can edit after you've sent them. Life doesn't come with edit options very often. What it does come with it owning mistakes and saying sorry. That's probably better than just editing something like you never made a mistake, but owning the mistake is much more effective. Owning it allows us to grow.

To influence those in your circle you must love them. A dictator can force influence but a true leader can influence and bring out the best in people. 

What you see differs based on your perspective. Looking down at something is much different than looking up at it. Looking at it from far is much different from looking at it close.  We often seem to think our perspective is the only one, but it isn’t. Try looking at the same thing from different perspectives. You’ll learn a lot. 

It’s easy to love when things go our way, when they behave how we want. Love is tested when things don’t go our way. It’s tested when they don’t behave how we wish. It’s tested when things aren’t going so good. You then learn how much love you have. 

The saying says it ain’t over till it’s over.  Maybe we write things off too quickly. When is something over? And if it’s over maybe it’s just a new beginning. We get to start over all the time. We don’t have to bring our past with us.  So in one regard we don’t have to write things off so fast. On the other hand we don’t have to carry the past forward with us.  It’s over when it needs to be over. It’s not over until it’s time for a new beginning.