My Riffs

It's easy to escalate. That's why peacemakers are so valuable. It's a more rare skill to make peace. Our natural tendencies are towards escalation. It takes a whole lot of strength, character and wisdom to be a peacemaker. Any old loose canon can be an escalator though. In today's environment of so much conflict, be a peacemaker.

One of the most common mistakes we make is assuming others think like we do. We project our own way of thinking on others and expect things based on how we think. We often forget, they’re not like me. They don’t think like me. If we can learn to leave room for others way of thinking we ourselves will grow and learn more from other people. 

Trust is the foundation of relationships. If you don't have trust, then you cannot have a relationship. Trust allows for honesty and honesty allows for real growth.

Everybody has an opinion. But why do we let the opinions of those who don't care effect us so much? It's okay to shrug off opinions of those who don't really care. If someone cares, then their opinion is worth much more. But for those who don't care, it's best to not be worried by their opinion.

Who are you? Are you being who you're supposed to be, or are you bending yourself to fit into some other version of yourself to fit what you think others want from you? Are you being who you're supposed to be or are you trying to emulate someone who you think is better than you? Getting out of your own way is one of the best things you can do. Get out of your own way and become who you are supposed to be.

If you're afraid, identify the lie. There will be one there somewhere. 

The difference between looking back and counting your blessings is one leaves you with regrets and the other with gratitude. It's not worth much time looking back. It's for sure worth your time counting your blessings.

Today I was using a vacuum, and the worlds worst analogy came to me. But I'll still go ahead with it. (haha and lol) Anyone who has used a vacuum for a period of time knows vacuums get jammed, plugged and pretty much unusable after enough usage. Here's the terrible analogy, don't be a vacuum going around intaking all the garbage in life. It will end up jamming you up and you'll become nearly useless. Don't be a receptacle for peoples garbage. Life is way way way too short to waste it on being a garbage can or vacuum cleaner. Hopefully I never come up with such a bad analogy again (insert crying laughing emoji)

How many situations in life do we want to do something but really can't? We can get drawn into battles that aren't our own. Social media and the news media bring so many things to our attention that can rile us up. We want to take up arms of some form and do something. But we have to be careful to not get drawn into battles that aren't ours to fight. There's a fine line of standing by and letting injustices occur and not engaging in battles that aren't ours. We should stand against injustice but we shouldn’t get sucked into battles we don't belong in.

It won't happen unless you plan on it happening. And by planning for it to happen, that means working for it to happen. You can't even win a lottery without some level of planning and work. So lofty goals are nothing more than day dreams if we don't create a plan and put it into action. That doesn't mean the plan will work exactly how we thought. But it will at least put you in motion towards that goal.

Being more is a good pursuit. Pushing your limits keeps you from stagnation. Settling into what you already are is the first step of decline.

What we pursue has an enormous cost to it. The higher the aim of the pursuit, the more it costs. Our pursuits cost us resources but also cost us other opportunities.  What we pursue must be worth saying no to everything else. 

You will never meet a strong person who had it easy. Every strong person has been made that way through tough circumstances.

This isn't my original thought, but it's a good challenge nonetheless. Jordan Peterson often implores people to use precise language. It's a lot harder than it sounds. I think we get lazy and don't take the time to use precise language. We say what's quickest and easiest to roughly communicate what we're feeling. But when we use precise language we suddenly become much more powerful. Our words carry much more meaning and weight. Practice using precise language.

There are times in life we’re unsure what to do next. Or we’re seeing lots of bad things happen to us or around us. There’s times we’ve lost. There’s times we are stuck.  When we don’t know what to do or think, a safe next step is always gratitude. If we can learn to be grateful on every situation and season, we will navigate out of those situations quicker and easier. 

One of the most underrated qualities to have is humility. We applaud people for so many outgoing qualities, but rarely notice the humble.

How well can you celebrate with someone when you yourself aren’t winning? How well can you empathize with someone when you’re doing great? How you handle the highs and lows of life and how you treat people from those places says everything about your character. 

Nobody likes pain, but pain is very useful. Don’t waste pain. Don’t discard the lessons it’s teaching. Don’t discard the growth that will come of it. Pain is our least favourite teacher. But when we discard pain we become bitter. When we learn from pain we become better. 

Don’t give your time away frivolously. With technology there are endless things that will want to take your time from you. And give you nothing in return. So spend your time more carefully than anything else. 

What you love will come out. It will come out in your actions. It will come out in where your time is spent. It will come out in where your money is spent. It will come out in the direction of your life.

I've observed that many of lives successes don't have a single step. Most successes in life come by getting lots of little things right. Here's an example, being healthy. There's no one thing you can do to be healthy. It takes a series of little things to be healthy. It's a combination of diet, sleep, exercise, thought life, work, supplements, etc. So health is the result of getting a server of little thing correct. In a way, this makes big things a whole lot easier. People who have accomplished great things are usually not any better or more talented than you or it, they just put in the work. And putting in the work means doing all the little things that other people didn't want to do. Thomas Edison arrived at his invention of the light bulb by a long, long series of little changes. I think something close to 1000 iteration. There was no quick, one step way of arriving at such an important discovery. If we're willing to get lots of little things right, we c...

It’s a simple rule, do no harm. Don’t do harm and you won’t at least make the world a worse place. Spread love and you’ll make it a better place. 

Consistency will produce consistent results. Inconstancy will product inconstant results. Don't expect consistent results when the input isn't consistent.

 We get paralyzed into inaction. Which is the worst possible outcome. We get stuck trying to figure out which option is best and end up not taking any option, or losing some of the better options. Being paralyzed into inaction means continuing with the least desirable option. Decisions are incredibly important, but not making a decision may the worst option.

Being kind will get better results than being harsh. Being harsh can get results but not as good as being kind. 

If it isn’t done in love, what has it accomplished? Nothing. 

If you want it, get it. Don’t wait for it to come to you.

The best form of confrontation is to confront yourself. Confrontation seems to have gotten more common in this digital world. But what does that accomplish? Not much. But confronting yourself sure does. When something bothers you, maybe confront yourself first. When someone bothers you, confront yourself first. 

How much we take for granted on a daily basis is quite remarkable. Most of us who have grown up in a developed world take much for granted. Seeing events transpire in the Ukraine is a strong reminder to be grateful for so many of the little things we take for granted each and every day.

Being in denial is a lot like running on a treadmill. We spend a lot of energy and waste a lot of time to get no where. The difference about being in denial though is we refuse to realize we’re even on that treadmill. We tell ourselves we’re out on a gorgeous trail. But really we’re stuck somewhere and losing time and energy.  Getting off the treadmill is the hardest thing. It’s uncomfortable. It takes courage to be honest with ourselves. But it’s the only way we can move forward. The areas of our life were in denial about are the exact areas holding us back.