My Riffs

Fortitude (from dictionary.com) noun 1. mental and emotional strength in facing difficulty, adversity, danger,or temptation courageously: Never once did her fortitude waver during that long illness. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Life requires fortitude. The more fortitude we have, the more we can navigate the ups and downs of life. This is something I feel like we are born with to a degree. But I believe it's something we can work on and improve. By healthy thinking. By surrounding ourselves with positive and strong people. If you're lacking in fortitude, surround yourself with positive and strong people. Share your weaknesses with them and they will help you. Work on fortitude. Take each challenge that comes at you, and be a little stronger than the previous challenge.

We're all a collection... A collection of the ideas, experiences, relationships and environment we have been exposed to. Some things we have little control over being exposed to; we have to either accept or reject what has become part of us from that exposure. But for most of us, we are products of what we willingly expose ourselves to. Which is quite an amazing thing. We have so much control of our world, we are spoiled. Why not take advantage of the control and make sure to ONLY add positive things to who you are. The relationships, the thoughts, the experiences... Make sure they're rich. Make sure they're full of positivity. You're the sum of these things you've collected. Make sure when totalled up, the result is overwhelmingly full, rich and positive.

Every story is nuanced beyond what you can tell in words, either written or spoken. Life is full of so much nuance. We cannot accurately every portray the full nuance of stories. The depth of the characters and their history and how they all came together is something that cannot be captured by a one person account of the facts they remembered. Remember this when you're hearing "something" about someone. You are only getting the quickest snapshot of one persons viewpoint. There is likely much much more nuance to the story than what you are hearing.

I recently heard a statement from one of my favourite thinkers, Jordan B. Peterson. He said in short that stronger is better than safer.  This struck a chord with me. So as a parent my duty is to make sure my kids are completely safe. No questions asked, that's my job. But more so, I need to make sure they're strong. I can't always keep them safe. But if I can make them strong, then they will be both strong and safe when I cannot keep them safe. There's a balance here. But in keeping someone safe, make sure you're not making them weak. It's more important to make people strong over safe.

You can tell a lot about a person by two things: 1. How they treat themselves 2. How they treat others Watch and learn these two things about someone, and then you know a lot about them.

It takes a long time to build something good. It takes mere moments to destroy something good. Be careful what you let in. It's often what is allowed in that destroys.

Life is hard. There's no way to sugar coat it. There are many responsibilities to bear. There are many challenging tasks to complete. We're all born with "baggage" that we have to deal with. Stuff that we don't like, but it's ours to deal with. There's two ways we can handle these responsibilities... 1. Go through every effort to avoide them. 2. Accept the responsibility. The first option requires much effort and provides little reward, ever. If we go with the second option above, something powerful happens in acceptance. Somehow in accepting responsibility we become bigger and better. Accepting it often doesn't mean liking it. Sometimes you may not like your reasonability/responsibilities at all. It may be a nasty tasting responsibility to swallow. But it's better than avoiding it. Accepting means taking the responsibility and doing our absolute best to see it through to the best of our ability. Stand up and accept your responsibiliti...

You can plant seeds in the snow, but that likely won't accomplish anything. You could even dig into the frozen earth and bury the seed, but it won't work. You can go to the garden and harvest during the spring, but you will just kill the seedlings. You can plant seed in the fall but what you plant will be destroyed soon after in the winter. You can't fight the season; your energy will be wasted. When it's time to invest and sacrifice rather than harvest, don't expect immediate results. But in that season invest, dig in and sacrifice. Don't try harvesting. When it's time to cultivate what you've planted, work hard. Take care of your investment and continue working on it diligently until it blossoms. Don't try harvesting. When it's time to harvest, get everything you can knowing winter is coming and there WILL be a famine where things do not come so easy. Don't fight the season, recognize it and utilize it for it's worth.

Do you prefer carpet, hardwood or eggshell? People seem to set around themselves their favourite type of flooring. Do you place around yourself a comfortable plush carpet where people are comfortable being around you and approaching you? This type of flooring can get messy and be harder to clean. Or do you prefer hardwood? Where people aren't as comfortable being around you and it's not as comfortable to approach you? But it's easy to keep clean. Or have you laid eggshells around yourself, making people super nervous to walk around you? Do they take a wide berth around you and avoid the flooring you've laid? This type of flooring is most messy for both ourselves and those around us.

Words mean a lot. The smartest individuals have most often gathered much of their knowledge and understanding from reading. That means somehow, they read words put to paper and were able to form themselves into something better than they already were. That’s the power of words! They shape and transform us by just reading and listening to them. So don’t speak idle words. Words that have no place being in existence.

We all have things we are anchored too. They're those things that could cause us to collapse in losing them. We have to face the reality we could lose those things though. As best we can, we have to learn to stand strong when an anchor no longer holds. Secondly though, we have to make sure the things we anchor too are worth it. We need to make sure they're valuable and worth being anchored to. The things we anchor to are the things that can make and break us. Choose the highest form of anchor possible.

We chase down facts, quotes and data. But the info is usually already there in front of you. We just need to train ourselves to peer a bit deeper past the surface. People in particular are usually telling you a whole lot when you peer beyond what you hear from them. It just takes closer examination. Peer close enough and people will usually tell you how they’re feeling. They’re telling you what kind of day they’ve had. They’re telling you what they’re interested in. It’s up to us to take the time to pay close attention. So instead of digging for a quote, pay close attention. You likely will gain the information after a closer examination.

For the most part, we all want to please other people. Or in other words, we want to be liked. Those who really people please to the extreme end up displeasing themselves. They become something other than themselves. Those who don’t people please end up being only themselves, with no input and positive benefit of pleasing others. The ends of both are similar in that both end up isolating the individual in some capacity. The people pleaser becomes a puppet and is isolated from reality. The self pleaser becomes an island and is isolated from others. To be well socialized means to have good balance between the two. Other people like you, and you develop yourself. There’s times you have to deny other people what they want, and there’s times you have to deny yourself of what you want.

We instinctively and unknowingly take on attributes of our surroundings. In particular the people we’re surrounded by. Take notice and inventory your closest surroundings. People, groups, ideas, physical surroundings. If these things are not positive and uplifting, change them. Or else you will continue taking on their attributes.

Love is probably the most prevalent theme in all pop culture. Music, stories, movies... Today being Valentines Day, a day focused on love, let’s not forget what real love is about. Love is about deference. It’s about kindness. It’s about commitment. Many, many people mistake what love really is and it costs them much grief and heart ache.

Our thoughts are so important. I couldn’t stress how important our thinking is. But when we speak our thoughts, something happens. The abstract becomes something real. Every single word we speak either builds or destroys. The more destruction we speak, the worse our life and world becomes. The more life we speak, the better our life and world becomes. Words translate into reality eventually. In a world of division and negativity, we need to place a strict filter on our speech. Filter out the words that destroy and only speak words that build. It’s the most practical and immediate way you can change your world.

Character doesn't fail. Character has set backs. Character experiences disappointment. Character even loses battles. However, character doesn't fail.

It's super important to ask ourselves what we're aiming at. You're not going to hit something your not aiming at, especially if it's something really worth our focus and aim. If you're not sure what you're aiming at, your destiny will be equally unsure. Life is too short to be aimless. Take aim and go for it. Even if your aim changes, that's completely fine. Just aim and go for it.

I’m very much for people using their voice. But equally important is making sure you have something to say. Don’t use your voice to just create noise. “Don’t talk unless you can improve the silence” - Jorge Luis Borges

Some days are kinda just blah. That's when you have opportunity to slow down and soak in all the good things. The ability to have a blah kinda day means your life is absent of some pretty bad things. Enjoy your blah days!

Investing in yourself is both necessary and rewarding. You can't go out into the world and make a difference until you've invested adequately in yourself. And the investment has to be continuous, or else you fall off. The amount you need to invest will vary depending on the needs and requirements around you, but the need will always be there. Some basic ways to invest in yourself. - Rest adequately. - Exercise. A healthy mind with an unhealthy body is limited. Keep your body healthy. - Eat well. For a healthy mind and body. - Educate yourself, not just by what education systems are teaching you. Really educate yourself, not everything you will learn through education channels is correct unfortunately. Learn how to sift through and filter information. Learn how to spot bias (because everything has a bias). Learn how to sift through hype. Learn how to deconstruct facts. - Read books and listen to podcasts. The great thing about podcasts are they make time productive that ...

There is a profound lack of ownership in today's world. People don't want to own their own problems and issues. People don't want to own anything that is difficult or requires commitment or sacrifice. It's always someone else's fault, or some else's problem. But something profound happens what we take ownership of something. That being, we can then fix it or make it better. Until you take ownership of something, you are unable to affect it. As long as you refuse to take ownership of your problems and weaknesses you will never better them. It's powerful when you stop blaming circumstances and people for the problems in your life. Take ownership, then affect change.

When you hear that phrase you know the situation is beyond control. It's not my favourite thing to say or hear. We don't do well with not being in control. Learning the following rule has helped me a lot: "When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves"  - Viktor E. Frankl

Getting to the next level will require something that getting to the current level didn't require. A new skill, a new method, a bigger sacrifice... We cannot assume the same toolset have have will get us to where we want to go. Don't rely too heavily on what you're currently good at, or currently know. It's good enough for the past, and possibly right now, but won't be enough for a better future.

To love requires a LOT. It's no small task living up to the fullness of love, but it is the highest aim we can have. This is the best description of love I have read (1 Corinthians 1:4-7 NIV) 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. The beauty of this is if we focus on loving as described above, we become much better ourself.

I frequently read leadership/business/success material. So often you will read an article that says something like “the one trait that all successful people possess”. The thing is, I’ve read many different “single skill” articles. You could drive yourself batty trying to chase that one elusive “single skill”. Sure, some people possess an extraordinary single skill that may seem to rocket them to success. But most likely it took more than one skill. Maybe learning to become as well rounded as you can is the closest thing we claim to a “single skill” that dictates success. Learn special skills, but not to the exclusion of being well rounded.

Finding the silver lining is a choice. There's is always a silver lining. Those who decide to ignore the silver lining find life is against them. Those who choose to find the silver lining find life forms them.

As humans, it feels good to climb social or hierarchal ladders. But ladders are literally empty. The people at the top most often are unhappy. Search for purpose and meaning instead of status and position.