My Riffs

A new year is an opportunity to reset a few things. That's why so many people make New Year resolutions. But many resolutions aren't kept. So use the opportunity to reset, but don't set unrealistic expectations. Make the goals and resolutions attainable, or else you're setting yourself up for failure! Happy New Year!

We all have masks. Sometimes we need to put on our brave face, even when we don't feel it. Sometimes we need to put on our confident face, even when we don't feel it. This isn't about being fake, it's about making ourselves point in a direction when we don't feel it. Some masks are fake though. And we have to make sure to get rid of those. Sometimes it's okay to let people know we feel weak and vulnerable. We don't need a mask that makes us appear smarter or more put together than we actually are. There's a line between being brave, and being something we're not. It's worth examining our masks and seeing which aren't needed.

The rules of life are very simple rules. Be kind, be honest, work hard, love. and maybe a few other. But they're quite simple. Reading the list above it would seem quite a simple task to undertake. But then life jumps in. And being kind if challenging, telling the truth may not be the easy decision and sometimes being lazy feels like the best course to take... Keeping things basic isn't by any means easy. Keeping things simple is actually difficult. Getting things wrong is easy. If we can reduce our actions to the simple rules we should be following, things will be better for us. If we can remove the emotion from out actions, we should be able to easier make the right and simple decisions.

Humans are generally very creative. We're all inventors. We all invent different things. Some people invent systems and codes. Some people invent art. We have to be careful with our inventive natures. We can also invent completely fabricated memories. Or we can invent problems that don't really exist. The time to be grounded in reality is when we're inventing problems. The time to be freed from reality is when we're inventing solutions.

The focus can become on things that may not be worth it. We may be wanting to make a big splash, or to be a big deal. But that shouldn't be a focus. The focus should be on doing small things greatly. Dream and aim big, but don't make "being a big deal" part of the dream. Achieve greatness by doing small things great. And doing "small things with great love" as Mother Teresa said.

We live in abundance. We don't need much of what we have. So what do we do with the abundance? Because we have have abundance of, someone has need of. Just being aware of those around us, and their needs is a good way to help deal with your abundance. If we can give away the things we don't need, we can help meet the needs of those around us. What potential value is something sitting unused in our home or garage? There's no value while it sits unused, but there's someone out there who can make use of it. It will also help to de-clutter our lives to go through and get rid of the abundance.

Merry Christmas everyone! Wishing everyone the best today!

Christmas is the season of giving.  Where have you given the most this season?  That’s what you love. 

Some decisions you make in advance of needing to make them. That’s so, in the moment when the decision needs to be made, it’s already made. Because in such moments it may be hard to make the right decision. So some things, decide them in advance and then the wrong decision isn’t even an option. * this is from a conversation I had tonight with someone wise.

Have you ever noticed that the most joyful things in life can’t really be explained? How do you explain the joy found in a great friendship? How do you explain the joy found in a spouse and children? How do you explain joy in viewing something majestic like the Grand Canyon? If you can explain it it may take away from that sense of awe and wonderment.

If you don’t dream big, you won’t accidentally walk into great things. So make your dreams larger than life, and you may just create them. For sure you’ll create more than if you hadn’t dreamed at all.

Be careful where you find your validation. You may need to keep going back to the same source to revalidate.

There's times when it's best to wait and delay, and then there's times when it's best to act quickly. It seems if it's a difficult tasks and less than desirable task, it may be worth doing immediately. If its a task that you just can't wait to do, it may be one worth delaying. Gratification often seems better delayed and hard work is better confronted head on.

You never come out poorer when being generous. Generosity always benefits the giver as much or more than the receiver.

If you accept abuse you allow it to continue. Abuse comes in many forms. You don’t have to be unkind, but you don’t have to accept it. Reject it and stop its spread.

Things can be created from both chaos and order. Some things need order in place to be able to be created, but some things need chaos for them to be created. When things are chaotic, look for opportunities of new things to be birthed. Don't discount the chaos, it's not all bad. Out of chaos some of the most important and biggest things have been born. Order creates things that require stability. Chaos creates things that overthrow inefficient or malfunctioning systems.

If you like it, you'll find something good in it. If you dislike it, you'll fine what you don't like. So examine your results, they may be a confirmation of your bias rather than a fair viewpoint.

Accomplishments are great things. But they're in the past. It matters more where you're going. The same way a changed persons past doesn't matter so much as their future, past accomplishments don't matter as much as future ones.

What you love will become evident. Check your spending habits. Check your time investments. Check your thought investments. Check you speech patterns. Do these things and you will figure out what you love.

Those tasks that we really don’t want to tackle are the ones that hold the most value. So many things I really don’t want to do. But in doing them I get much more value than doing the easy tasks.

You can’t hide your true colours indefinitely. You can paint a layer over them, but eventually that layer will peel back and the true colour will be exposed. If we don’t want our true colours to be exposed, we have a great option. We can change our true colours. Rather than attempt a cover up, it’s better to change colours.

Repetition can be a good and bad thing. One way repetition can become bad is when we end up believing something we repeat. We can repeat something so much we believe it. So if we’re being repetitious we need to make sure we’re saying good things.

The critic (not the critical) is an important role. The critic actually opens themself up for criticism. I’m not talking the negative person who only sees the bad. I’m talking about the critic who wants to make things better and who uses their voice to do so. That person doesn’t have an easy job. But it’s important. Things don’t improve if there is no criticism. When we make the critic the villain, we lose something valuable. This should be the role the media plays in the world today. It’s turned into political activism, but in theory the media should play an important role in making things better. The critic is valuable. As long as they’re not a critical person and only point out the bad with no solutions or positivity.

If you have something important to say, you will offend someone. So, we can't hold back important ideas just because it may offend someone. Conversely we cannot speak something to offend somebody. That doesn't help move the conversation forward. But speaking something true may offend someone, but it will help move the idea forward. So unless you never say something, you will offend someone. Even being silent will offend someone though. So, it's safe to say you will offend someone. So don't let that hinder speaking your important ideas and truths.

Our greatest fears seem to rarely manifest in reality. But we sure do obsesses over them. The energy we invest into our fears doesn't move us ahead, it keeps us back. Fear is a tool. But it's not one that needs much energy invested into it. That energy should be put into good possibilities rather than fears.

Sometimes we don’t know what to do. In those moments, it’s usually safe to do nothing. Action that is aimless usually causes more problems.

One of the most destructive forces in the world is lies, or half-truths. Lies and half-truths damage ourself when we spread them, and they flow out and damage things far out from ourselves even. Truth and love are the most powerful forces on earth, and they are intertwined. So the message is, speak the truth, in love. There isn't anything more powerful than doing that.

Not financial investments. Cause you don't always get what you put in there. But watch what you're investing into life. Bitterness, hatred, distrust will only reap the same. Love, mercy, kindness, gentleness will only reap the same in large. There may be some weeds pop up from time to time, but the harvest will be in large what you've planted.

Sometimes in problem solving we can really become blinded. Very often in problem solving, the best solutions come from a different perspective or a paradigm shift. So taking a break from the problem (however that looks in a given circumstance) can actually be one of the most productive things to do. Another good thing is getting different perspective on the problem from trusted sources.

If satisfaction cannot be found, chances are it's being sought in the wrong place(s). The other factors could be the wrong expectations for satisfaction have been set.

You win or lose by the way you choose. Winning and losing in life has less to do with what happens to us and more to do with the things we choose. You get to choose your destiny in many ways. Don’t let life dictate your wins and losses. Choose the wins.

Skill alone won’t take you places. Attitude can take you further than skill can. Obviously you need some skill but if your attitude is wrong, you won’t go far. Developing a good attitude is one of the most important things you can do in being successful.

You have to learn when to take a loss. Learn when to "hold em and to fold em". Some things aren't worth fighting for. Energy wasted on the wrong things is paid for by the right things. So learn when to take an l (loss). Just make sure it's a lesson learned, not a complete loss.

Perhaps the worst sin in life is knowing right and not doing it. - Martin Luther King  Sitting idle while wrong is being done makes you complicit.  Do right, no matter what it may seem to cost you. 

We all want things to go well. Nobody truly likes hardship and adversity. But when we're smooth sailing, there's surpassingly little to gain. We don't grow much in those moments and we don't learn much either. It may be a time to catch our breath, but we can't handle smooth sailing too long. Our guard goes down and we become vulnerable. Embracing the chaos and challenges in life happens to be one of the best things we can do. Facing it head on and not shying away from it. Remember when things are going smooth, you had better be preparing for a storm.

Things can get off to rocky starts. And it can impede overall progress. But if you finish well, the bad start won't even matter. It matters much more how you finish than how you start.

For almost everyone who has the ability to read this, your basic needs are already met. There rest are just wants. There is real satisfaction in having your needs met. But there isn't any meaningful type of satisfaction to be found in having your wants met. Wants tend to be a whole lot more shallow than needs. Wants temporarily satisfy, but needs have longer lasting satisfaction. But if we're honest, a lot of our chasing is chasing down wants, not needs. Recognizing our needs and them being met brings more satisfaction than a whole lot of wants being met.

Convenience almost always wins. Better doesn’t always win. Convenience more often wins over quality. Think about the success of McDonalds. It’s hard to make something super convenient yet high quality. There’s trade offs between the two. Do you want to appeal to masses or a small group with more refined tastes?

There seems to be a growing trend of outrage bringing people together. And often the result is destructive and violence. Outrage doesn’t seem to be a good unifying factor. It would seem there are betters ways to handle the greviance. Things that bring together should be a common love or positive goal. Otherwise the results are mayhem. Which is never a better result than the greviance itself.

I love hearing those categorizations you like "there's only two types of people in the world...". There's truth to them but they maybe are often over simplifications of real life. But that's what I am gonna do here. Everything we consume or create will either take us up or bring us down. The more things we are involved in that bring us down, the more we will be down. The more things we are involved in that bring us up will cause us to be up. Our destination or our location often is determined by what we've been consuming and creating.

I couldn't complete a task today, simply because I wasn't given information. Information enables. Lack of information immobilizes. Leaders need to spread information in order to mobilize their team. Incomplete or lack of information immobilizes and harms team functionility. One way to check if the information is spreading is to watch team members most furthest from the source of information. Are they performing in line with the vision?

The more you’re looking down, the more you miss. Both literally and figuratively. Keep your head up. Stay alert. Again both literally and figuratively. You learn more. You gain more confidence. You see more opportunities. You come across to others better and change perceptions of yourself in a very good and important way. Looking down brings us further down. Where you’re looking sets your aim. So keep your head up, no matter what. It determines your destination.

You can skim over the top and get the job done. And it feels okay. You can also take care of the details and that feels great. And people can tell when the details are attended to and when they’re skimmed over. People appreciate the details, even when they don’t realize it. They will gravitate to the places where the details are attended to.

In most of our habitual activities, we should be able to find some joy in it. Work becomes tedious, but we should still be able to find some joy in our work. In various other roles in life, parent, friend, spouse, we need to at time still make sure we're finding the joy in it. When things become a drag, there is something wrong. If you really cannot find joy in something you're doing, you may be doing the wrong thing.

Work is a trade of time and money. Relationships are a trade of wants and needs. Purchases are a trade of your money for a good or service. Charity is a trade of your money or other resource for some good self realization. In life we’re negotiating all the time, many times we don’t even realize it. Just remember when you’re gaining something, you’re giving something up too. Make sure the bargain is actually good, examine when you’re giving up as much as what you’re gaining.

Sometimes we don’t know what our purpose is at that moment. One thing we can always do in those times is to help others find their purpose. There’s a lot of purpose to be found in helping others find their purpose.

We gain nothing by making others pay for what we deem as a wrongdoing. It only leaves a deficit for both parties. The only way to come up without a net loss is to forgive. You may have lost something important, maybe even tangible, but the only way to start recovering it is to forgive. A LOT harder to do than say though.

In our complex world, there is great danger in oversimplifying something. This is why labelling people is so dangerous. To mark somebody is "one thing" is dangerous because they are more than that one thing, and cannot be defined by even one legitimate characteristic. They may be that "one thing" but they're also so much more than that. Oversimplifying any issue, situation or person is inherently danger, because in doing so, we remove some truths when we reduce it to a singular simplicity.

Failure is defined by not trying. Otherwise it’s just a setback.

Every day is a gift. How you livin?

The key to riding life is to never get too high or too low. When things aren’t going well, don’t allow yourself to get too low. When thing are going well, don’t allow yourself to get too high. Both extremes have their danger. That doesn’t mean be stoic, but it means be balanced to matter what end of the spectrum you happen to be in.

One of the most pertinent questions someone who has reasonably sorted themselves out should be asking themselves is, "what am I doing with my talents/skills?". Unrealized skills and talents is a painful thing to watch. We're given talents and skills to use and share with the world, to make it a better place. When we don't use them, we're robbing ourself and others.

Sometimes when we don't know what to do, we start forcing things. We start solutioning things when we haven't even diagnosed the problem. Sometimes when we don't know what to do, it's best to do nothing at all. We can make matters worse by forcing things. Especially when we haven't understood what's the issue first.

Love isn't what society tells us. It's a whole lot more. Love is something that grows. It's something that needs to be cultivated. Love is something that you decide to stay in. Love is commitment. Love is selfless. We have to be careful to not allow society to define such an important term. Love is a cumulation of many traits and characteristics. It cannot be reduced down to something as simple as infatuation.

Good intentions unfortunately don't do much. They're important, but good intentions don't accomplish anything. They're just an aim or goal, and they're important. But many people with good intentions haven't done anything, and good intentions have even done much harm. So don't assume your good intentions are enough, or that they will even produce the right results. Good intentions have to be followed up by good planning and wisdom.

The best ideas are the ones which help the maximum amount of people. That’s what makes it a good idea. Bad ideas conversely impact the largest amount of people too. Okay ideas benefit mostly us.

Unless you’re in a court of law, stop wasting time proving your right. You can give all needed proof and the receiver may not understand or receive it. Proof isn’t enough to cure ignorance. Let your actions do the talking and do less talking.

There is this strange tendency in humans to want what is forbidden. At the dawn of humanity we weren't able to stay away from the one forbidden thing. Forbidding something can often backfire on us as it plays into this tendency. Forbidding something may have opposite of the intended effect and cause more desire than before. Sometimes (not always of course) allowing something but informing about the risk has a better result.

Culture trumps vision. The greatest visions can be thwarted by culture. The vision has to be compatible with the culture. Culture will win. The need to change a culture does occur, however culture never changes overnight and it's never certain you can change a given culture. So making certain the vision works with a given culture is critical.

I just read a great quote from Dan Rockwell, “Relationships are the foundation for remarkable results”. The underlying principle is that two can accomplish more than twice as much as what one person can. There are increasing returns in teams. Create good relationships and you will accomplish far more than you would on your own.

Pettiness is like having a pebble in your shoe. It's annoying, but you can walk with it a for a little while... But eventually, you'll be stopped by it until it's removed. And so, it's best to just remove the pettiness as soon as you feel it. At best, it will slow you down.

"...innovation is saying 'no' to 1,000 things." So much to do, so little time. Resources are limited. What we say no to, is almost more important than what we say yes to. Saying no to things that are a waste of time, allow us to pursue the proper yeses, with excellence. Without saying no, we will be fruitlessly chasing all the yeses. And never accomplish anything great. Don't be intimidated to say no. It allows you to make your yeses all the much more important and fruitful.

Your lens is your filter that you see the world through. If we're seeing everybody as bad, evil, untrustworthy, etc... Maybe our lens needs to be cleaned or changed.

This is a departure from the usual content here. And I by no means feel qualified to give marriage and dating advice. Here’s just one thing that most people lose site of in dating: We fall in love with someone but forget that we’re marrying more than just the person we’re in love with at that moment. We’re also marrying their past, their family, their habits, their health, their future and etc. So take that into account. You’re marrying a whole lot more than just this moment of love you’re in.

I’ve seen people become shells of who they were. Sometimes I think it’s unavoidable. Sometimes tragedy strikes and leaves someone battered and barely alive, in more ways than one. And that person becomes just a shell of who they were. Other times I’ve seen people stake their whole identity on a single thing and have that thing taken away. Then they become just a shell of who they were. This type of becoming a shell is avoidable. We shouldn’t stake our entire identity on one single thing. Often you will see someone bank their identity on a skill or possession. But when that skill is no longer needed or if they lose that possession, they lose their identity with it. But if we make our identity much deeper than a single skill or possession, we can protect against becoming irrelevant and a shell of our former self. The extra benefit is we become a more well rounded individual, capable of much more and a deeper person than before.

As many of my posts point to, this is about balance. Learning when to hold on and when to let go is a very important lesson in life. We usually hold the wrong things and sometimes let go of the wrong things. People who learn to master this skill have a much better quality life than those who don’t.

Two possible responses to life and circumstances that come at us. Two responses, one letter difference, but completely different outcomes. We HAVE to choose to get better, not bitter. Life throws things we don't like, and bitter is the easy way to handle it in the immediate, but the hard way in the long run.

You told them, right? So you're all good, you've communicated.  Well hold on...  Communication has only happened if they understood what you said. It's in the hands of the speaker to deliver the message to the recipient. (yes, some obtuse people refuse to receive the message). So, you told them. You checked that they understood. Now you've communicated. Unreceived messages aren't communication.

When I think about teaching, I immediately think of a teacher and a whiteboard or chalkboard even. I picture that teacher explaining some foreign concept to hungry pupils.  As a parent though, teaching looks much much different. And I think the vast majority of teaching looks different. We want to teach through wise words and examples. And I cannot overemphasize how importantt our words are. Words can kill or bring to life, they’re so important.  But I think we end up teaching (or learning) through observing actions rather moreso than listening to spoken words.  I think we remember more of what someone did, than what someone said.  We disregard what someone says when their actions don’t match their words. Which means we place more emphasis on actions.  So parents and leaders are teaching more simply by how they act out in the world, then by what they say. We need to make sure our actions match our words. And we need to make sure that we confes...

There's a principle that something has to die in order for something else to live. I'm sure the principle isn't perfectly demonstrated in every single instance of life... but maybe it is. I'm sure someone a lot smarter than me has thought that through. But there is a lot of truth in the principle, and especially when it comes to getting better personally or even in groups or teams. In order to go somewhere new, or learn something new, or be better in one area, we very often have to let something go (or die). Wanting to get in shape, we have to let that free time, or bad diet die. Wanting to learn a new skill, there also will be free time that you will have to let go of. This contrast can go on and on, for almost everything. You're not truly willing to go somewhere new until you're willing to let go of where you are. Let some things die, so you can live.

Self can be a disease. An absolutely horrible, crippling disease. We can become so wrapped up in ourselves that we have no ability to functions. We're literally wrapped in a straight jacket of self. Self-care, self-awareness, self-improvement? Yes, yes and yes! But we have to be extremely careful they don't become self-centredness, self-hyper-awareness and self-involved. Self is something that needs to be tended to, because like a weed it will grow and overtake us. It can entangle us and cause us to be just a shell of what we're supposed to be.

Be liberal in giving. Be conservative in taking. Be liberal in giving praise. Be conservative in taking praise in. Be liberal in love. Be liberal in grace. Be liberal in patience. Be conservative in anything that doesn't build someone else up.

Here’s a simple formula for life: 1. Figure out your why. Then never let that change. 2. Figure out how. And constantly keep that changing.

You can’t expect change doing the following: - what you’ve previously been doing - by doing nothing Change only comes through change agents. What are change agents? - people - ideas - systems & processes The best way to effect change is through good communication. You can expect change without the actions described above.

For some reason we always need a bad guy. We like to point the finger at someone or something and say, that’s the bad guy. At least it’s a tendency I fight. It’s like we need to villify someone in order to make ourselves the good guy. We can spend our life finding everybody’s “gotcha”. Cause everybody has a “gotcha”. That one (or more) thing that they aren’t good at, or maybe need improvement on or have messed up in. But is that anyway to live? Is that any way to look at people? What if we reversed it and looked for everybody’s “gotcha” opposite? That one special characteristic and quality that sets them apart from everybody else. There doesn’t need to be a villain. Let’s build each other up. There’s enough bad in the world that we don’t need to search out villains.

It’s something we often learn a bit later in our life, after we make the mistake. And that mistake is breaking trust. When we have someone’s trust, one of the worst things we can do is break that. Trust is one of the most valuable things we can possess. And when we break that, we do major damage. To the trust/person we broke it with as well as internal damage. Breaking a trust means doing damage to ourselves and subsequently to all the other relationships connected to us. So breaking one trust means, breaking a bunch of trusts. When trusted with something, handle it with extreme care. You may break a lot more than you can fix.

There's nothing worse than seeing someone force something that just doesn't work. Or just shouldn't be. This seems to happen when we "take matters into our own hands", but really we shouldn't be. I believe in owning things, but the key is owning things under our control. Taking things out of our control, and trying to take them under our control is one of the biggest wastes of time. So yes, be in control and ownership. But don't try control things that are our of your hands.

Everybody has a pretty interesting story. And if we can get to know someone's story, we will understand them a whole lot better. So try and know someone's story. You will likely learn something or some things. It's people's stories that make them who they are. It's their stories that make them interesting. It never ceases to amaze me the things I find out about people. So many people have been though things that I could not have imagined. There is much more bravery and strength out there than we realize. In that, there's much brokenness and hurt. Listening to someone's story is one way we can show them love.

We're all just figuring this thing called life out. Nobody has all the answers, or everything figured out. Experts in any given subject matter are/should be still learning. We never come to know everything. So be careful in trusting experts. But we cannot discount experts either. The point of this is to extend grace to everyone . We're all on a journey, we're all in different places. We all have different backgrounds and thus different perspectives. Nobody is 100% right. Again, this isn't a call to not trust people, but rather a call to extend grace to people. People who are just like us, on a journey, but maybe in a bit different space.

I can't think of anything more important than love, with the exception of truth. These two things are of absolute importance. And they are very closely related, and can't properly work without the other. Love without truth is ineffective. Truth without love is ineffective. Anything done without truth is destructive though. The absence of truth means at some point corruption, decay and eventually collapse will occur. Truth is like a frame or structure of a building. Without it, you cannot build anything. Truth provides frame, it corrects, it straightens and it prevents corruption.

Mistakes are generally seen as a bad thing. What makes them bad though is leaving them simply as a mistake. What makes them good though is turning them into a lesson learned. A mistake that turns into a lesson learned isn't a waste. Mistakes can be valuable teaching tools. We need to remember that as people who make mistakes. We also need to remember that as teachers. If we help those under our care to learn lessons from their mistakes, we are helping them. If we handle mistakes wrong, they are simply a negative experience. We can turn them into a positive experience by making them a lesson learned though.

You need both. You need heart people and you need head people. You need conservatives and you need liberals. The problems occur when we demonize the group that is opposite of us. We may not be able to relate to someone else, but we should be able to respect them and realize their importance.

The more you give to someone doesn't always mean the more they will appreciate or make use of it. So be careful that when you are giving, the person or cause will benefit from what you're giving. There are plenty of other needs if your giving will be wasted. There are takers who seem to appreciate things less, the more you give. Always give, but take be cautious what you're giving too.

Most of my assessments (borderline judgements :) are completely based on me. We see things from where we are, rarely putting ourselves into other people's shoes. So we make assessments about other people and situations, solely based on our perspective. But it would be a different story if we at least attempted to put ourselves into a place to share their perspective. We would likely be a whole lot more patient when we tried to put ourselves into their position.

One of the simplest and best life hacks s to simply be grateful. This simple thing has literally helped people overcome physical and mental illness. This simple thing can transform our whole outlook on life. Today in thanksgiving day in Canada. It’s a good time to take stock of alll the good things we’re grateful for, and thereby be healthier and happier.

The possible destinations for our future depend on there people. We can't get where we want to go without help. Yes, I fully believe we are in charge of our future, and our future is up to ourselves. But getting there will be made possible or impossible based on the relationships and partnerships we have. Who we decide to link up with has a massive bearing on where  we end up. So once you get a goal in mind, make sure you surround yourself with those who will help you get there.

You know those kind of people who always leave you feeling better? Whether it be about yourself or about a situation? Strive to be that person. Those are the type of people we want to be around. The kind of people we want to spend time with. We can accomplish this by guarding what we speak. To only speak of things in a positive and encouraging manner. Even when discussing something that may be unpleasant, it can always be finished in a positive and encouraging manner.

“I don’t know”... these can sometimes be the most refreshing words to hear. All it takes is being around a know it all to appreciate someone who doesn’t know it all. Don’t feel pressured to know it all. Because once you know it all, you have nothing more to learn. And once you have nothing to learn, there’s no need to listen. And people don’t overly enjoy spending lots of time with someone who doesn’t listen.

The saying goes "people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care"... Or something along those lines. Before imparting some knowledge/wisdom, it's best to understand that person, so you can show care for them. To learn their background, to learn why they've come to their conclusions, or why they're broken, etc. Once you know that person, you can truly care and then use your knowledge to help them.

I think a better test of relationship is how well you can disagree. It's easy to get along when you agree, but how do you handle disagreement? That's the better test of relationship.

Learning what to hold and what to let go is one of lives greatest lessons to learn. If we're not careful, every little thing can stick to us and we end up holding it. Every political disagreement, every perceived slight, every jealousy, miscommunication, and on the list goes. This get's VERY heavy. I know it from experience. Learning what to let go of is one of the most important lessons I'm learning. I can't carry every issue, problem or inequity I come across. When I let other people's problems become my own, I end up with a burden I can't manage. By no means am I suggesting being calloused and uncaring either. I am speaking about carrying weights and things that just don't really matter. Other people matter very much. Just make sure you carry them in things that really matter. Don't take weights from others that are worthwhile. Don't take weights on from yourself that just don't matter. Learn what to hold and what to let go.

When we reach a goal or milestone, it's easy to pause and rest on that success. But it's amazing how fast we get behind when we sit on a success. Just use success to propel you forward to another one, don't pause too long on the success.

Didn’t everyone’s Mom have this rule, “if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all”. I wonder how the world would change if everyone adhered to this rule? I wonder how our lives personally would change if we adhered to this? This doesn’t mean don’t speak truths, but even in speaking difficult truths, we can always be kind.

In our society convenience seems to be the top factor is almost everything. We live at an extremely fast pace, so it only makes sense that convenience is the highest priority. Internet speeds, microwaves, pre-cooked or prepared meals, instant access to music, shows, books and information, Amazon, grocery delivery, and on and on. Because we're so busy we look for shortcuts of convenience to help us manage our busy lives. We've accepted that convenience is a good thing. But is it? It seems that doing what is convenient isn't always what's best. The most convenient coffee isn't the best coffee. The best coffee takes time to make. The best meals take time to make, they're not found in drive throughs. The deepest and most meaningful relationships are quite inconvenient, they take time and energy. The shortest route somewhere may not be the best route. The things that come free or easy are hard to appreciate. It's the things that are inconvenient, that tak...

"This is gonna change your life" or "it was life changing". Well, everything you encounter in some way changes your life. We're changing constantly whether we like it or not. So in a way, everything is life changing. You're the sum of your habits, so if it doesn't become or altar your habits, it probably isn't changing your life significantly.

1. Stooping shouldn’t be about where other people are. It’s about making sure to never go beneath yourself, not others. 2. Only go down to a lower level if you’re helping someone up. And in that case don’t join them at a low level, reach down and help them up.

Failing to try is failing. Try and not succeeding isn’t a failure. It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you put your mind to it. But first you have to try. Every success started with someone trying something that probably scared them.

Today's society is obsessed with celebrity, status and position. Everybody's aim is seems it to be at the top of the heap. But they don't realize, the top is empty. There's nothing up there, except the fact you can say you're there. Observe those who are "at the top". That alone should tell you all you need to know about the top. Aim high, as high as you can. But aim based on being your best, not at being above someone else.

Sometimes we are surrounded by storm. And we're tossed to and fro in the storm. Sometimes we don't know what end is up or down. It's easy to be overcome by the storm. Some storms we brought on ourselves. Some storms we didn't ask for. In each storm though, be as close to the eye of the storm as possible. Try to centre yourself and be a spectator rather than unwilling participator being tossed about in the storm. In every storm, I believe there is a place of peace, you just have to find it. Which is MUCH harder to do than I could ever convey in words.

Technology has allowed information to pass at a unprecedented rate. This has allowed many things to become normalized in a rapid state. Things that may be been happening at the fringes or in dark corners have become "normalized'. One thing is, seeing something written or published makes it seem more legitimate. So technology has allowed certain things to appear as legitimate just because they now have a platform. The other thing is, the things happening on the fringes weren't spoken about in the public eye. Now with technology and the ability for an idea to spread across the globe in moments, has allowed certain bad ideas to propagate from the dark corners out into the main light. And those who are less discerning see this and see them as "normal". So don't trust something just because it may be considered normal. Very bizarre ideas can become normalized, thanks in large part to technology.

Just life everything in life, self awareness needs to be handled in balance. A baby has no self awareness. As you watch a child get older, then become more self aware. They may become shy, or even the opposite, they may quite enjoy getting attention. This is a good thing, self awareness is given and can be developed to the point where we can really refine ourselves. But self awareness can overcome us, rather than being a useful tool. Self awareness can cause some to hide their whole life. And that's not a good thing. Hold self awareness in a careful balance, using it's good attributes to become a better you and keeping it from overcoming you and causing you to hide.

Total cost of ownership. This is something we rarely think about. We usually only think about up front costs. We rarely think of what it will cost us over the lifetime of the purchase or our lifetime. Our decisions usually have an upfront cost, but also a total cost. And making a decision based on the upfront cost only can get us into serious trouble. When making big decsions, think about what it will cost in a years time, in 5 years time or even longer. The upfront cost may be cheap, but the total cost may be more than you can afford.

In videography you will notice in really beautiful scenes, they are often shown in slow motion. When do we slow down enough to enjoy the beauty and good things around us? We have to move at a breakneck pace to just keep up. But in doing so we miss so much of the simple beauty around us. Try setting aside time to move at slow mo. You may notice things you've never noticed as regular speed.

We are never hopeless, I firmly believe that. But there are times we feel hopeless. And without hope, we have nothing. It's dangerous to descend into hopelessness. It's a dangerous space to occupy. Find someone to talk to when feeling hopeless. Find someone who can provide a realistic and true hope.

We're bombarded by marketing all day, every day. The underlying premise of that marketing is we don't have enough. Between marketing and social media, it can sure make someone feel like they aren't enough. We seem to forget something very important... The person rich enough to buy everything isn't happier than the one who can't buy anything.

Most know some form of the lesson, you reap what you sew. Or some call it karma. But I've learned a similar but different lesson to this. It seems to me that what you wish for other people (particularly those you disagree with or maybe don't naturally get along with) is what happens to you. So wishing something bad for someone may actually cause that to happen bad thing to yourself. The lesson learned is to never wish anyone but the best. Even if it's difficult, because that bad wish just may come back and become reality for yourself. The same is true if you wish someone the best.

The bad: we can get in trouble this way. One wrong acceptance can lead to a catastrophe. The good: don't minimize one small thing, because it may lead to something bigger or a preferred end.

Plans go sideways, often and almost always. Plans are good and even necessary. But more importantly, what’s the plan when there’s no plan? That’s where instincts and preparation come into place. How well educated are you on the subject? How is your patience? How do you handle stress? A work emergency today has me considering these questions. We will see how it goes.